TARBIYYAH - تربيه

Literally: A rearing. A nursing. Training or educating. Maintenance. Culture, good manners, good breeding. A correcting or a chastising; an admonition, a chastisement. Regulating or improving by the use of chemical or other agents; a treatment. To bring up and train. To correct or punish. To treat with what will improve, or preserve. The family's — particularly the mother — raising a child is also called tarbiyyah.

As an Islamic term: The action of Allah that emerges from His rubûbiyyah. It is as follows:

رَبِّ That is, He Who does tarbiyyah the ‘âlam with all its components, each of which is an ‘âlam, and particles of which orderly move like stars.

Know that Allah ‘azza wa jalla determined a point of perfection for everything and deposited in each of them an inclination towards it. Everything moves to that point of perfection as though they received a ma’nawî command. In its journey to its perfection point, each thing is in need of what will help it and what will repulse the things that hinder it, and this is the tarbiyyah of ‘Azza wa jalla.

If you look at the universe carefully and reflect, you will see that there are many groups and nations, like the sons of Âdam, individually and collectively employed in the duties their Sâni’ has assigned to them; they strive diligently and obey the laws of their Khâliq. How strange it is that man deviates from the sphere of such general law and order of the universe!

 Signs of Miraculousness-43

 

اَلرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ Their positioning: These two names point to the two fundamentals of the tarbiyyah. Since the name Rahmân possesses the meaning of Razzâq, and Razzâq is suitable for the attraction of benefits, so too, the name Rahîm possesses the meaning of Ghaffâr, and Ghaffâr is conformable with the repulsion of harm, and these are the two fundamentals of the tarbiyyah.

 Signs of Miraculousness-45

 

Allah determined the perfection point of man as reaching the highest rank of humanity, which is a’lâ ‘illiyyin, through being an ‘abd possessing fadhîlah, îmân and taqwâ and gaining the pleasure and acceptance of Allah. According to the Sharî’ah, the family is responsible for the tarbiyyah of a child. That is, it is their duty to raise their child according to the laws and principles of religion. To fulfil their duty, the family should sustain the child's needs that help him reach his perfection point and protect him from the obstacles like the harams and fitnah of the time that will prevent him from reaching that perfection point.

By interfering with the rubûbiyyah of Allah and following the modern trends based on the Western civilisation and human mind, the fancies and desires of the nafs, if the family determines a perfection point for their child, such as worldly ranks, having a comfortable life in this world, gaining the attention and acceptance of people, etc. And if they strive for the child to reach that presumed point of perfection, neglect the âkhirah and turn the face of the child to the transient worldly life, it is the misuse of compassion, which is the most powerful and valuable feeling given by Allah to the family, especially the mother, for saving the child from the dangers of both worlds. It is as follows:

Yes, a mother sacrificing her rûh to save her child from danger without wanting any reward and sacrificing herself for her child with true ikhlas as her fitrî duty shows that women possess extremely exalted heroism. With the development of this heroism, she can save both her life in this world and her eternal life by it. But due to certain ill currents, this powerful and valuable character does not develop or is misused. Here is a small example out of hundreds:

A compassionate mother makes every sacrifice to ensure her child's life in this world is not endangered and to ensure his benefits and prosperity; she provides him with tarbiyyah accordingly. Saying, “May my son be a Commander,” she gives all her property, takes him from the hâfidh school and sends him to Europe. But she does not think that her child's eternal life is falling into danger and works to save him from worldly imprisonment, without considering his falling into the prison of Jahannam. As the opposite of the compassion in her fitrah, she makes her innocent child, who should have been a shafî’ in the akhirah, a claimant. That child will complain, "Why did you cause this destruction of mine without strengthening and protecting my îmân?" Because he did not fully receive Islamic tarbiyyah, in this world too, he cannot respond to the rights of his mother's wondrous compassion in a way it deserves, and perhaps he commits many wrongs.

If true compassion is not misused and if, with the mystery of such compassion, she works to save her helpless child from Jahannam, which is eternal imprisonment, and from dying amidst dhalâlah, which is eternal extinction, the child will always send nûrs to the rûh of his mother with his good deeds after her death since the equivalent of all the good deeds of that child will be recorded in the book of good deeds of his mother, and he will not be a claimant in the âkhirah but a shafî’ with all his rûh and heart and will be a blessed child in eternal life.

The Twenty-Fourth Flash- A conversation with mu’min women who are my âkhirah sisters

 

First Question: Why is it that in this age, mothers who are self-sacrificing and carry an exalted compassion, are deprived of inheriting the assets of their children? Why has Qadar allowed this?

The answer given is this: Mothers in this age have, by way of inculcation, misspent their compassion whereby they impel their children by all their forces to this world and the schools, with the presumption that their children must achieve fame, honour, rank and official posts. Even if they are pious, they withdraw their children from the Quranic ‘ilms and bind them to the world. It is due to the mistake of this compassion that Qadar has sentenced them to this deprivation.

Kastamonu Addendum-290